Friday, February 3, 2006

Deer in Traffic.

Yesterday was odd, because I had worked most of the night and slept in.  I missed an opportunity to see a house which I'm interested in buying, and rescheduled that for Saturday.  I did some work, bought a friend a birthday card and gift, worked out, came home to change and ended up crashed out on the sofa for a few winks before dinner. . . which turned into a 4 hour nap.  I time warped to 10pm and awoke to find that my cell phone had voice mail and I was 3 hours late for a dinner reservation at one of my favorite restaurants, Pot Pie, for the birthday get together.  So, I bounced, called the posse and joined them at the Record Bar for some intermittently groovy music, hip shaking, conversation, hugs, and so on.  I think we decided on the date when I should have a house party, if there are no conflicts.  February 24th or 25th, which is Mardi Gras weekend.  Hmm.  I'm thinking of a theme here.  We closed the place and we caught a tip from Aaron, a local musician, about a good upcoming show on the 17th at the Cup and Saucer.  Former members of Banshee?  Alrighty.   Three of us, including the birthday girl, ended up at the Dark Horse Tavern (aka Torres Pizzeria) listening to a guitarist named Justin strum and sing his version of some hip hop and R&B greats, but totally white-bread style.  Since he's there every Thursday and we caught the end of his set, I want to go back and catch more.  The crowd of college kids was surly and the help was unresponsive. Or vice versa.  At one point a guy asked us to help wake up "Ryan" who was passed out in the booth next to us.  I punched him in the leg and he became responsive, but I would say it was a borderline case of alcohol poisoning. A bum wandered in and sold Tricia a flower, which she wore behind her ear. Since we couldn't get service at the pizza counter, we went to Joe's Pizza around the corner.  It was approaching 3am at this point.  We sat on the stairs in front of what used to be Tizer's and discussed previous wild times.

After all that, I went to work.  I did some paperwork and prepared to go install a replacement router for one which is operating on it's last functioning power supply in Liberty, MO.  I decided that I was not cognizant enough to safely drive, so, again, I decided to catch a few winksunder my desk, where there is a comforter for just this kind of occasion.  And again, I time warped four hours to 8am when people started showing up at the office.  I guess, after burning the candle at both ends all week, my body was not capable of a short nap.  I read my email, rescheduled the router replacement for Monday morning, and went to the bathroom to put myself together (read: slick down the bedhead, shake the bar smoke smell out of my clothes, and brush my teeth).  I motored to the Sonic for a breakfast burrito, to a secluded place where I could change into fresh undergarments and shoes from my gym bag, and then to a videoconference meeting at the office building across the street from mine.  I put in my two cents, and mostly listened.  I admired my stubble on the video conference monitor.  Looks good on TV.

When I got back to my office, there were some tasks waiting in email and I went to Charlie Hooper's for lunch.  Fish & Chips.  Greasy and good.  I put in a full day at the office, including some time helping to fix a routing problem in Nebraska.  It was well after 5 when I left there.  I stopped by my brother's house to wait out the rush hour and ask my nephew if he would like to go ice skating.  Nope.  He's sick.  Drew has some kind of a cold and a fever.  He was happily sitting on the side of his bed eating chicken soup out of a plastic bowl and watching some silly cartoons.  I played hide and seek with the niece for about as long as I could stand it, then went to the gym.  On the way there, I was taking the mostly uninteresting exit off of I-435 onto I-70.  The SUV in front of me stood on their brakes and ditched to the right shoulder.  There was a deer running about 10 feet in front of my left fender in traffic as I also dodged to the right and came almost to a stop.  The car behind me skidded and leaned on their horn.  The car behind them skidded too.  They didn't see the very large white tailed doe as it bounded in front of me and off to the right toward the Royals Stadium.  Strange and harrowing.  I needed some adrenaline for my workout, I guess. 

Out of curiosity, I googled it.  There are an estimated one million white tailed deer in Missouri.  There are 2500 times more deer in Missouri than inthe 1920's, when they were condsidered endangered.  The top 10 counties for vehicle versus deer accidents are around Kansas City and St. Louis.  In 2001, there were 8100 car/deer collisions in Missouri.  There are between 400 and 500 car/deer accidents in the Kansas City metro area each year.  I believe it.  I see roadkill deer at least once a month.  I, personally, have nearly hit at least 5 deer in the past 5 years.  In some cases, I slowed down when I saw the deer beside the road, and it's a good thing.  When they get scared and run, they sometimes run into your path.  The herd of deer which I frequently see at night grazing around the parking lot of my office building are unshakable.  You can drive your car right up to some of them, and they will stand there and look at you like you're in their way.  I have been known to see just how close I can get.  Sometimes I get scared before the deer do.  I have been on the jogging trail near Independence Center Mall and literally jogged right past deer standing next to the trail as they watched me pass.  Unbelievable.  My most amazing deer encounter involved driving down Gregory one night and a deer bounded into the road right in front of my car.  I had no time at all to react, so it's a good thing the deer did.  It literally jumped OVER my car.  I saw it's head flash in front of my headlights one second, and saw it coming down in my rearview mirror the next.  And that is ALL I saw.

After my workout, I totally gorged myself with Chinese buffet food.  Hot and Spicy Chicken.  General Tso's Chicken.  (Who is General Tso and why is his courage in question?)  Honey Baked Chicken.  Hey, I need the protien.  I ate rice and broccoli, too.  And some fruit and some pudding.  $7.  I couldn't assemble the ingredients for that and would probably pay someone else that much just so I wouldn't have to wash the dishes.  In fact, I did.

On the way home from dinner, which is approximately two miles.  I saw no less than 3 toilets next to 43rd Street in front of two houses between Sterling and Pittman.  Surreal.  I guess it's time for six more weeks of winter and a good time to replace a toilet. <shrug>  Howdy neighbor.  Y'know they have a deal on toilets at Sutherland's.


  1. I've had many a man deer encounter on that onramp to 435 off of Gregory by the office.  There's a cross in the ground there on the side of the road which makes me wonder if a deer was involved.

  2. It sounds like your candle is burning at both ends and in the middle.  This comes from a much older cousin who couldn't keep up with you. lol. The deer thing is something I have had on any number of occasions here in SE OK.  The deer own the roads and highways.  Luckily, so far I have only hit one and that with only minor car damage.  An injured one ran out in front of me just recently across the border in limped across the road, poor thing.  CH, did you get my email about Kristen???  

  3. Hi there.  I'm in Lafayette county.  We have 43 acres full of deer... until it's deer season, then we can't find a single one.